I did this in 2013 on the old blog, and now that it’s 2018, I figured I’d post it and add the novels I’ve written in the five years since I posted that.
So herewith, all the first lines to all my novels:
“C’mon, ‘Stairway to Heaven’ is the best rock and roll song ever.”
The night before the kidnappings, Betty Brant dreamt of Ned Leeds, her husband, lying next to her in bed, asleep and alive.
—Spider-Man: Venom’s Wrath (full disclosure: that line was written by my collaborator on that novel, José R. Nieto)
The argument started when Cordelia saw what Xander was wearing.
—Buffy the Vampire Slayer: The Xander Years Volume 1
Iolaus never saw the staff coming.
—Young Hercules: Cheiron’s Warriors
“So where are you guys going for spring break?”
—Young Hercules: The Ares Alliance
Captain Klag’s right arm itched.
—Star Trek: The Next Generation: Diplomatic Implausibility
Rygel flipped his cards over. “Four priestesses. I win again.”
—Farscape: House of Cards
“Shields 1 and 2 are now down, Shield 3 is buckling, and warp drive is down!”
—Star Trek: Deep Space Nine: Demons of Air and Darkness
“Captain, I believe you should come down to see this.”
—Star Trek: The Brave and the Bold Book 1
Tharia didn’t cry when his three mates died.
—Star Trek: The Brave and the Bold Book 2
Matilda Dixon had been baking a lemon cake when she was told that her husband was dead.
Everyone I know is dead.
—Gene Roddenberry’s Andromeda: Destruction of Illusions
The boy could taste the scent of the lIngta’ on the wind.
—Star Trek: The Lost Era: The Art of the Impossible
The faces of the greatest warriors of the past ten centuries stared down at Klag, son of M’Raq.
—Star Trek: I.K.S. Gorkon Book 1: A Good Day to Die
“I am Klag, son of M’Raq, captain of the I.K.S. Gorkon—and I summon you, my fellow members of the Order of the Bat’leth, in a call to honor.”
—Star Trek: I.K.S. Gorkon Book 2: Honor Bound
Gan Brightblade’s last thoughts before his neck was broken were about how happy he was.
Aaron Vricella regarded the younger man sitting opposite him with a combination of awe and outrage.
—Resident Evil: Genesis
Major Timothy Cain didn’t take any shit.
—Resident Evil: Apocalypse
Sunrise on Qo’noS had lost its appeal for Ambassador Worf.
—Star Trek: The Next Generation: A Time for War, a Time for Peace
—Worlds of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine: Satisfaction is Not Guaranteed
Before the alarm sounded, Shipmaster Vor Ellis had thought it was a good day.
—Star Trek: I.K.S. Gorkon Book 3: Enemy Territory
Ele’er sat impatiently on her stool in the learning room. Mother was late, of course—she always was late for their learning sessions, which meant they ended later, which meant that Ele’er was always late for sky-singing.
—Star Trek: Articles of the Federation
Sergeant Malcolm Reynolds’s life had reduced itself to the critical imperative of running as fast as he could.
Peter Parker looked at the clock on the wall, smiled, and said, “We’ve got a few minutes, so let’s go to the next chapter: the Periodic Table of Elements.”
—Spider-Man: Down These Mean Streets
Erik had been cleaning ale off the demon skull mounted behind the bar when the stranger walked in.
—World of Warcraft: Cycle of Hatred
Spike was looking forward to a pleasant evening. The grocery store had restocked the Weetabix shelf, giving Spike the opportunity to clean it out again, the butcher had plenty of blood, and the little trick with the tree branch in the Blockbuster returns bin had nabbed him a videotape of Henry V—Branagh’s version, thankfully, not Olivier’s.
—Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Blackout
As soon as she felt Cliff Nadaner’s mind, Nova knew that she could destroy her family’s murderer with but a thought.
—StarCraft: Ghost: Nova
Kes tried to screen out the voices in her head.
—Star Trek: Mirror Universe: The Mirror-Scaled Serpent
“Do we really need to be just hangin’ here, B?”
—Buffy the Vampire Slayer: The Deathless
The tank screamed over the ridge, crushing the grass and bamboo under its treads, guns blazing as it spit bullets and shells into the large temple and its occupants.
—Command and Conquer: Tiberium Wars
Dr. Jim Knable stood on the Ravens’ Gate Bridge, a seething tide of humanity heading straight for him.
—Resident Evil: Extinction
A chill November breeze blew John Soeder’s hair into his face, Mother Nature’s reminder to get a haircut in the absence of his actual mother being around to nag him about it.
They held off on letting this universe die in the hopes that it would provide something interesting.
—Star Trek: The Next Generation: Q & A
The bat’leth sliced through the air, heading straight for Captain Klag’s neck.
—Star Trek: Klingon Empire: A Burning House
Detective Don Flack stared at the one pill that rattled around the bottom of the prescription bottle.
—CSI: NY: Four Walls
The chief priest sat in the canoe as the boy rowed to the sacred island.
—Supernatural: Bone Key
“I can assure you, Dalin, that I am but a plain, simple clothier. I’ve no idea where the shapeshifter might be.”
—Star Trek: Myriad Universes: A Gutted World
The Zirkiv only looks like a three-hundred-and-fifty-year-old Earth Cargo Service vessel.
—Star Trek: A Singular Destiny
The rain had not let up for the better part of an hour.
—Supernatural: Heart of the Dragon
Vaspar had been thinking about how much he’d been enjoying the calm and quiet of the past five weeks when he found the dead body.
The Eso swung its deadly claw at Folami’s head.
—Guilt in Innocence
When you’re immortal, you literally have all the time in the world to craft and implement plans. If one plan fails, it matters little, for there is plenty of time to try another.
—Dungeons & Dragons: Dark Sun: Under the Crimson Sun
A yellow streak flew overhead, stirring up the litter on 20th Street.
—SCPD: The Case of the Claw
Oddly, given how miserable he’d been the past few years, Elthor lothSerra was happier than he’d ever been in his century-plus of life when he died.
Zoë Kerrigan held up her cell phone, currently in picture-taking mode, finger poised over the camera icon, waiting for the red panda to wake up.
—Leverage: The Zoo Job
Lord Albin was late.
One of the great mysteries of The Klingon Art of War is who wrote it.
—Star Trek: The Klingon Art of War
The great contradiction of Ichabod Crane’s life was that he was constantly surrounded by people, yet had never been more alone.
—Sleepy Hollow: Children of the Revolution
The skies are sometimes blue, sometimes black, sometimes gray.
—Marvel’s Thor: Dueling with Giants
Captain Kirti Patel had thought it to be a good day up until the blast came out of nowhere and made a smoking hole in Sergeant Castro’s chest.
—Stargate SG-1: Kali’s Wrath
The great world tree Yggdrasil sits at the center of the Nine Worlds, linking each world to the other eight.
—Marvel’s Sif: Even Dragons Have Their Endings
At the center of the Nine Worlds is Yggdrasil, the world tree, linking all of them via its might roots and powerful branches.
—Marvel’s Warriors Three: Godhood’s End
If you are reading this, then you are about to learn a great deal about something that has been one of the most closely guarded secrets of this young century. Though in truth, the secret goes back to the 19th century…
—Orphan Black: Classified Clone Report
I would like to state for the record that starting Shabbos with a crazed unicorn charging at you horn-first kinda sucks.
—A Furnace Sealed